I can’t recall the last time I had a visitor hang out on my chin for this long. I assume I was probably wearing a camisole without a coat to go out in the dead of winter and crying about how I would never find a boyfriend. Yeah, that long ago. I decided if I couldn’t steam, pick, or dry her off my face I would just get to know her. Readers, meet Laverne.
What is your skin type?
Honestly, I don’t know. I am really just here to make your life miserable.
What product do you swear-by?
Ha! Why would I tell you? Although, it does kind of hurt that you’re using a really thick concealer on me. It stifles my joy.
Have you ever had any beauty mis-haps?
Sorry that I got blood on your Frette towels. I hope you didn’t pay full price for those. I didn’t. I got them on Cyber Monday for half-off.
How long do you think you will last?
I should apologize for all the flaking too. I don’t know what’s happening. You’ve tried everything on me but here I am still standing.
Why would I want to leave? I love the thread count on your sheets and you watch quality television.
What’s for dinner? When will your husband be home? I figure the bigger and redder I get the more he will notice me.
Feel free to send me a DM on IG @reinesoleillesoin